grief

I recently started on labor and delivery at Vanderbilt. My first day on the floor I had to do a c/section. As an old nurse, this was fairly routine. Until I had a glance at the suction canister. I won't go into detail, but it threw me back 2 1/2 years. I was in the c/section that Evette had with Blake. AT the time, it was a beautiful thing. I got to take care of my sister. I was there to know she had the best care. Breena was helping circulate. The best for anesthesia, Charles. The best team working one her. I remember Sandra was there but sorry I forget who scrubbed. Dr Blake has always been a favorite of mine. She delivered Amanda, and Evette was (14 at the time), was there to watch that delivery of mine.

I knew she was loosing a lot of blood by watching the suction canister. I really knew when I saw Charles starting a second line. But I was calm and confident in those I worked with.

I ended up giving her 2 units of PRBC the next day.

I was honored to be there for it all. I loved helping that baby stay with his mom and dad. Annette stayed and got to be there for it all.

All this came to me in that OR at vandy, and I almost lost it. I explained to the nurse orienting me, and I got through the moment.

Yesterday I worked with Debra Wage, CNM. She delivered Brette and Sydney. Debra and I had a great working relationship. I really respected her practice, how she treated her patients, and that she PROVED babies can come out without a lot of cutting and tearing, over and over again. She's great. She's what I wanted to be when I grew up, but then I had 6 kids and plans changed. Working with her brought back so many more memories. I was with Evette and Jason when they had Syd. Evette was in the bathroom and said, "it feels like I really need to break my water", I said ok...., go for it I guess. She grunted a little and her water broke. Only time I have ever seen that in 26 years of doing this.

I helped her with breastfeeding each child. I remember with Brette Jason called like 6 am, wanted to know how early I'd be over to help more.

I miss that, being needed by her, but also just being with her.

I know I will never forget her, or stop missing her. Right now it just really hurts so much.

science experiment

Did I ever mention I really hate science fair time of the year? I am not sure how much they learn. I know some parents do more of the project than the children. I'd rather have experiments that the class rooms all work on together. Even if it meant spending the day at the school. Science can be an exciting time. I just think this is done in much to broad of a way. Maybe if they gave everyone a topic and narrowed the purpose. Like how many germs grow in your house. Or how can you cut down those germs. Just my opinion. Matthew's experiment was to see if electricity could be made using a potato. He did very well and seemed to understand the process. He also made a very good grade on it.

sydney's program

Sydney was a tourist in a recent 1st grade school program. She did so good! We all were very proud of her.

doug's birthday

Small birthday party at home for Doug's birthday. He even made his own cake as I had work.

This one is blurry but it is so funny. Adam is all excited and "pulling " brette along. Her face looks like she is just not too sure about all this!

skate party for syd

Sydney's Birthday party was held once at church and once at the ice skating rink. With a large family there are lots to help little ones skate. Catie and Becca came and the girls love when they help. Amber brought her boyfriend, Adam, and he help a lot also. AS you can see by the pictures he had as much fun as the kids. Amber, Ashley and Amanda of course help. Jason's cousin's and parents were there. Amy was there with Blake and Bailey. They fit right in with the rest of us. Now to get Nana and Poppa on skates!

family update