I find it kinda funny I can start my blog with the statement, Usually when I return from my mission trips..... Funny because 10 years ago I had not yet been on one trip. I always had an interest in going, but because of all those babies, I couldn't go. I've now been on 10 trips, I think.
Whenever I went to Mexico, I almost always returned excited. excited to share pictures, stories, and the way I felt about the trip. I would have pictures printed out the next day, or at least before the next Sunday, to share at church. Even the first year, when I returned very angry. I was angry at my world, my children, myself. Angry because we had so much and yet were so ungrateful. But even then, I wanted to share so much.
Haiti is different. I don't think it is just the earthquake and the destruction it caused. I went to help after Katrina and didn't feel this way. After both of my trips now, its taken a while before I could really start talking about it. It's not that the people are all walking around crying or sad, because they aren't . The children don't look deprived, even though they are. No one is lying on the floor saying feed me, they are beyond that. There is so much that needs done. Maybe I am overwhelmed. I try hard not to be. I know I am but one person. But truthfully, with each patient I see, I try to treat them as if they are the only one I have to treat. I can't give them money, a job, a future, but I can give them the dignity and respect most
I do leave there wondering what more I can do. Not what more can millions of dollars do, or millions of people do, but what can I do. I have a plan to train the Haitians, like nurse aide training. But no idea if I will ever be able to have the time off to really do the training.
The picture of the smiling woman links my 2 visits. She came to me the first time pregnant. She was about 30 weeks. With her first 2 pregnancies she had became ill and lost each one. She wanted us to do a c-section while this one was still alive so she could have a live babe. I tried to do what I could. I sent her for an ultrasound, but the results didn't show us she was far enough along we could safely deliver the baby. When I went back, there she was! Her baby was only a few days old. She was so happy to bring her to see me! She shows me there is hope, hope for Haiti.
